1. You don’t go six weeks without washing or brushing your hair.
2. Your hairstylist only clips the hair on your head.
3. Your hairstylist doesn’t wash and trim around your private parts.
4. Your haircut doesn’t include a manicure, pedicure, and massage.
5. You sit still for your hairstylist.
6. You don’t snap at or try to play with her scissors, combs, brushes, and blow dryers.
7. Your hairstylist doesn’t clean your ears.
8. Your hairstylist doesn’t remove eye boogers and clean around your eyes.
9. You’ve probably never growled at, bitten or scratched your hairstylist.
10. No matter how scared or cranky or ill you feel, you never, ever poop or pee on your hairstylist.